And I walk away frustrated as if I'm talking to air.
Well....that's because you are talking to air.
The Biblical God doesn't make sense on so many levels, it's quite ridiculous to think it exists. And since that flavor is the most spread flavor of God, I tend to assume that if there were a God, this would be it. So my conclusion is: none exist.
BTW isn't it strange that before some Roman emperor made Christianity the state religion, most people on earth worshipped all kinds of true God's, and never heard about Jehovah? Only a small country of shepherds worshipped that one. Doesn't make much of an impression.
Especially because those shepherds at times also worshipped other Gods they thought were equally real as Jehovah. Can you imagine seeing all the supposed miracles by Jehovah, and then go worship a wooden idol? Of course not! So either the miracles never happened, or it wasn't clear Jehovah performed them, or the miracles attributed to the other God's were just as convincing.
For me it was an eye-opening moment to realize that to the Israelites, 'false' gods were just as real as Jehovah.
And they are just as real, as none of them actually exists as a living being....